"She never looked nice. She looked like art.."

i find this a very interesting quote from a book called 'Eleanor & Park' by Rainbow Rowell. it describes the relationship i have with quite a number of people. people who didn't want to be seen or associated with me but confide in me about many things. they are often seasonal in the sense that they come to me when times are hard, when they need an ear to listen or a thought to share or discuss. once it is over, they take a step back, slowly walking towards the door. most of them return, but some disappear. but that's life. people walk in and out of our lives all the time.

i guess what I'm trying to say here is I seem to be the person who caters to certain needs of other people. it is a rather concealed role i must say, one that is obvious only to the two of us at one time. i am the art that lacks beauty or in Rowell's words "..never looked nice". however, when they're with me, they feel something. when they think of me, they are reminded of not the way i look, but the way i made them feel when we're together. i assume it isn't such a bad thing, given that the feelings they have are pleasant.

we don't take many pictures together neither do we go out on social meetings a lot. the bond was only meant to be seen and shared by the two of us, them and me but not for anyone else to know. i wonder if the feelings they have, they are embarrassed to share with the rest of the world, since i am no pretty sight and associations with me doesn't bring much benefit to them. or they simply choose to conceal it so it will remain exclusive only for the both of us. i really don't know. what i do know is every single one of those memories means a whole lot to me and i wish it does to you too.