from me to you

i know exactly how i feel about you. You are someone that i like without hoping for anything in return. why? that's simple. we live in two different worlds and i would prefer that they remain separate. why?
i'm afraid that if you know me too well, you will begin to see more of my flaws.
i'm afraid that if we talk, you will discover that i am not very clever nor am i witty.
i'm afraid that if you see me clearly, it will become obvious to you my imperfections in a glance.

hence why i never made an effort to know you better. besides, people talk and more often than not, you are the subject of interest. all i have to do is listen and i get to know the little bits and pieces of your life. my friends are your friends after all.
when you talk to them, i listen and smile.
when you laugh with them, i listen and smile.
when you go out with them, i get the pleasure of your company.

once i was lucky enough to enjoy your gentlemanly gestures at a supermarket. it was possibly one of my worse days; menstruation and diarrhoea all at once. you offered to hold my shopping basket and we went around getting all the stuff i needed. i must've looked like a pile of sickly mess. lol. i should thank you for the experience because believe it or not, no one has ever done that for me. well. except for my dad.. but that doesn't count. haha. but no worries, i will not mistake your common courtesy for affection. that's just how you treat the ladies right ;)

chivalry is indeed a rarity

why am i comfortable with the way things are? 

it's simply because you're way out of my league.
how do i know this?
the only times i've ever attracted anyone, they are one funny looking businessman (whom i thought was a profesional) that calls at 2 in the morning asking what i'm doing and some weird  friend of friend on facebook who stalks my profile. it all happened because i was being polite and empathized with their sob stories. yes, they totally freaked me out.

so here i am and there you are on two different sides of a river that is life. it wouldn't seem right for us to stand side by side because there will always be something wrong with the picture. i don't belong in your world and you can't settle with mine. you were meant for greatness, your voice will always be heard although sometimes, it carries a sting to those who listens. you are "all that" and i'm just.. me :)

whether or not i will ever know who you really are, it is a question that bears no answer. as for now, i am happy with the way we are. yes, i've heard that there has been some exchanges of comments between you and a friend, which doesn't make much sense because it is safe to say that you do not know me. you may be able to put a name to my face but that's just it. nothing more. honestly, it scares me a little that you might know more about me. there might be more things not to like than there is to like. sighs.. insecurities, insecurities..

i guess sometimes people just like people. the person of interest doesn't necessarily have to play a part in your life. the fact that you once knew each other and shared some memories is good enough to last a lifetime. you will always wish the other person the best in life even if you will not be apart of it anymore. 

a message from me to you, sincerely i thank you. i'm glad we got the chance to meet  :)